So I saw a show and I have opinions!
I've already given you a spoiler warning in the title and the cover photo and here's a third. Consider yourself warned.
Second warning is that I took screenshots while watching the episode on VH1 online, which you can't rewind or pause. So these photos are like, not as good as they could be. They are the product of me finding something interesting and rapidly screenshotting.
Moving on. Here are some thoughts organized by the pictures I took.
1. Yuhua's testimonial look is andro-gorgeous realness.
As you'll see in my other points, I think a lot of the queens this season look terrifying in their boy looks, but Yuhua is beautiful.
2. Blair has baby face to the ends of the earth.
Blaire's entrance look and her promo look didn't excite me (get ready for her runway look tho). But oh my god she looks like a child out of drag. One of the queens during the obligatory "who are these men" de-dragging scene describes her as a "boyscout" out of drag, but I'm going more with "cubscout." Those cheeks are that of an infant.
3. Monét X Change™ has the exact same vocal pitch and cadence as Bob the Drag Queen (but maybe a bit lower).
Monét X Change™, who's name format I am taking from her instagram, has a vocal cadence and pitch incredibly similar to Bob the Drag Queen. So much that when I'm writing this and listening to Untucked in another tab, I keep thinking it's Bob. It's probably because she's yet another gay black man with a low butch voice, and that's a style of voice I haven't been exposed to much outside of Bob, but holy crap there's a similarity.
4. I love Monique Heart's entrance look.
The two piece belly-exposing look gives me minor vibes of Jasmine Master's entrance look, but only for the belly. It's gorgeous; I'm obsessed with the holo-glitter, and I'm ready.
5. I'm not sure if Dusty is cute out of drag or not.
I've already seen several memes saying that she looks like Luke from Modern Family which might be a contributing factor.
6. I am very sure that the Vixen is cute out of drag.
Oh my god those cheekbones, that smile, that look. I'm obsessed. 10/10 cutest boy look this season.
7. I love how the Vixen does her eyebrows.
That gold. That threading of the gold through the rest of the brow. That gold used as highlight. That touch of gold in the tear duct. I'm here for it.
On another note that I don't have a photo for, can we talk about how the Vixen described her drag style as political art? All the rest of these queens are like "pageant!" and "comedy!" and "glamour!" and then the Vixen comes and craps on all their lives with "political art."
Like, there's a dash of Sasha Velour rhetoric there that you can't ignore, but while Velour almost perfectly embodies the intellectualism of Judith Butler (intellectual but not very accessible), the Vixen doesn't seem to rely so much on calling her work "art." Also if her work is mostly protest and political demonstration based, that's amazing.
7. Aquaria out of drag scares the hell out of me.
Something about her boy look just gives me evil vibes??? Probably a mix of the collar, the eyebrows, and the gap tooth. She softens narratively a bit later in the episode, but right off she terrifies me.
I should also note that she is 21 and I am also 21. That might be a factor.
8. Aquaria out of drag without eyebrows looks like a naked mole rat.
9. How much did the producers have to spend for this mini challenge?
I'm guessing that they were trying to recreate Season 8 with having all the winners there, but couldn't book them all, so they decided with an absurd number of drag race royalty, winners and other contestants.
There are so many queens. Are they like, contractually obligated to show if they're asked?
Also Mayhem was fun in this mini-challenge. Monét was great and all, but how the editing captured her performance didn't seem win worthy to me, so I'm assuming it was something you had to be there for. Top two were Monét and the Vixen.
10. Eureka's boy look eyebrows are sinful.
I think it's the color, and the shape, and the texture. I do not look forward to seeing her brows this season.
11. Blair came through on the runway.
Sadly, I can feel the editing narrative of Lashauwn Beyond "you're pretty but have no personality" setting in already. She's a tad shy, but she has stage presence. I'm so into this look. It definitely surprised me.
12. The Vixen was robbed.
The lines, the shapes, the attitude, the colors. There was so much going on that I felt like deserved a top ranking. Maybe not a win, but definitely top.
13. I also loved Yuhua's look.
She made top so I won't say too much.
Her look was fun, and the editing narrative from the testimonials of "oh she's a seamstress but she can't design!" felt forced and rude. I loved the look. I felt like there were unintentional parallels between her critique of "people have done caution tape before" and Kalorie's critique of "people have done money dresses before," but Yuhua was amazing.
Loved her face too.
14. Miz Cracker was like, kinda robbed?
Like, Mayhem Miller had a great look, don't get me wrong. But it also sort of looked like Peppermint's Village People look.
I'm not launching protests or anything cuz I wasn't here for Miz Cracker's contour, but her look, out of all the looks, looked the most expensive. It doesn't look like dollar store materials and it looks factory realness. I'm into it.
15. Xtina was like, supremely underused?
With Gaga's appearance on the season prior, it's hard not to compare the two, and for Christina, wow she barely got any air time. With the amount she was used in the promo material, I thought she'd be used more.
I guess the main challenge wasn't as Christina centric as Gaga's season, so there's that going on, but still.
Anyway, those were my thoughts on the episode. Stay tuned every week because I am definitely going to have more opinions as the season progresses.