White House Staffers Offer Replica Present To Jealous, Unimpressed Trump

Everyone wants to feel included.

WASHINGTON -- In the wake of several democratic leaders receiving suspicious packages containing explosive devices Wednesday, White House staffers report that their replica present "failed entirely" to qualm President Trump's jealousy.

"Once he heard the news about the packages sent to Obama and Clinton, he wouldn't stop talking about it," said a senior White House staff member who requested to remain anonymous. "So we had to do something."

The same staff member explained that the team had all but an hour to put something together.

"We figured after that much time he would take to Twitter," he said.

Other reports stated that upon receiving the replica pipe bomb, made for less than twenty dollars worth of supplies from the nearest Home Depot, Trump flew into a rage. 

"For some reason he has a weird amount of knowledge about pipe bombs," another staffer said. "Like, we thought it would fool him, but he somehow knew it was fake immediately."

At press time, Trump had allegedly forgotten about the incident and was searching for his phone.